Please remember, this column is designed to help the consumer seeking behavioral-health information, and not intended to be any form of psychotherapy or a replacement for professional, individualized services. Opinions expressed in the column are those of the columnist and do not represent the position of other SelfhelpMagazine.com staff.

Question

I would like to make this holiday season more meaningful for me and my family. Any suggestions?

Answer

There are four suggestions I'd offer to you to enrich the season:

1. Practice ritual. Don't rely only on your church or synagogue for such rituals. Develop some yourself. Some rituals might include times of family sharing of holidays past to include stories about loved ones who are gone, prayer times at specific points during the season in which prayer is spontaneous and reflects each person's thoughts and feelings, or perhaps the scheduled practice of meaningful acts of kindness.

2. Foster memories. Think of this season as a building time in which you and your family forge some of the history which can be a source of comfort and enjoyment in the future. Family traditions can be a rich source of such memory-building.

3. Practice simplicity. Clearly the biggest challenge to the spiritual meaning of these days is rampant commercialism. Resist it. Focus on quality rather than quantity when it comes to gifts.

4. Keep your sense of humor. Crowded stores and busy highways give rise to bah-humbugism if you're not careful.

03/15/98

Richard B. Patterson is a clinical psychologist in private practice in El Paso, TX. He is the author of three books on psychology and spirituality.