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Question

Is guilt always bad? Seems to me that guilt can sometimes be like a road sign pointing us in the right direction.

Answer

I agree. The great psychiatrist Karl Menninger argued in his book *What Ever Became of Sin?* that guilt did indeed have an appropriate place in healthy adjustment. Guilt, however, can become a problem in two ways.

If I do something wrong and feel guilt for my behavior, then the guilt can indeed be an impetus to encourage me to change my behavior. However, we sometimes get into feeling guilty for who we are! In other words, if I begin to feel guilty for the kind of person I am, the guilt becomes destructive.

Second, because guilt can be a powerful motivator, we can be vulnerable to manipulation by others. The proverbial guilt trip is something well known to many. We need to protect ourselves against guilt trips by developing a strong and honest capacity to evaluate our own behavior, thus being better able to determine when indeed we have done something wrong.

Third, guilt is a problem when we are unable to resolve it through a process of self-forgiveness. This is no easy task. But if guilt persists over one's sins of the past, then the problem most likely is not with guilt but with a failure or inability to forgive oneself.

The resolution of guilt requires a resolve to change as well as a process of forgiveness. If guilt persists, then a spiritually open-minded counselor might also be of help.

03/14/98

Richard B. Patterson is a clinical psychologist in private practice in El Paso, TX. He is the author of three books on psychology and spirituality.